Rules For Writing Good

by The Russler

ideas from multiple sources, viz.
1. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
2. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, (as of ten or more words,) for the purpose of clarity, to their antecedents.
3. If you have questions about the proper pronouns to use, contact myself or another experienced writer.
4. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
5. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
6. It is not proper to ever split an infinitive.
7. Do not sit your document on the desk and lay down for a nap until you check for proper use of all verbs.
8. Steer clear of incorrect verb forms that have snuck into the language.
9. Improper dialectic words should be avoided, irregardless of their seeming usefulness.
10. The adverb always follows the verb.
11. Write all adverbial forms correct.
12. Do not string too many prepositional phrases together at the risk of the feeling of walking through the valley of the shadow of the death of your composition.
13. The passive voice is to be avoided.
14. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
15. It is also preferable not to use a preposition to end a sentence with.
16. And do not start a sentence with a conjunction.
17. No sentence fragments.
18. Complete sentences:   important.
19. Never write run-on sentences they are hard to read.
20. Do not forget to use the proper punctuation marks
21. Need I say anything about how to punctuate questions.
22. Exclamation marks lose their impact when they are overused!!!!!
23. Use the semicolon properly, always use it where it is appropriate; and never where it is not.
24. Omit commas, that are unnecessary.
25. Experts say, "Avoid overuse of 'quotation "marks."'"
26. Use parentheses with caution:   do not put them (where they do not belong), and do not forget to close them (as that is indicative of carelessness.
27. Reserve the apostrophe for it's proper use, and omit it when its not needed.
28. Hyphenate between sy-
llables only, and avoid unn-
ecessary hyphens.
29. Don't use contractions in formal writing.
30. Except in rare cases, formal writing should not use abbr.
31. Always spell out a word, & do not use a symbol in its place.
32. Never use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
33. Smaller numbers used in a sentence should also be spelled out, especially those consisting of only 1 digit.
34. Do not use no double negatives.
35. Do not never use no triple negatives.
36. Watch out for mispellings.
37. Beware of homonyms, as their are some words that sound alike while there meaning is quite different.
38. Never ever use repetitive redundancies; stamp out and eliminate them.
39. This may seem trivial, and I do not mean to tell you something that you already know, indeed, that every good writer should know, but do not ramble on and on and on once you have made your point and the reader has had an opportunity to understand that point, whatever that point may be, at the risk of boring the reader, whoever he or she might be, (the "or she" was put in there for the sake of the feminists, or whatever they would be called--I myself tend to be a little old-fashioned in that regard, you might even say sexist, although I do not call it that,) and making your sentences, indeed you entire train of thought, difficult, perhaps even impossible, although nothing is really impossible, so they say, whoever "they" are--have you ever wondered that?--to follow.
40. If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
41. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
42. The omission of a single letter can make all the difference in the word.
43. There is an exception to every rule except this one.
47. Be careful to number sequential items correctly.
44. If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
45. A writer must not shift your point of view.
46. As Richard Rogers once said, "Don't ever quote me."
47. It has also been said, "Avoid quotations whose source is unknown."
48. Never go off on a tangent, which in geometry is a line that intersects a curve at only one point, as definied by Euclid, who lived in the sixth century, which was dominated by the Goths, who lived in what we know as Poland, home of Lech Walensa, a man of great courage, something of which we could all use a little more, not only in our actions, but in our writing as well.
49. Always pick on the correct idiom.
50. Take the bull by the hand and stay away from mixed metaphors.
51. Nix trendy locutions that sound flaky.
52. Never use radically groovy out-of-date slang, even when it sounds, like, you know, totally cool.
53. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
54. Instead, employ the vernacular.
55. If I have told you once, I have told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole.
56. Profanity in a formal document is [expletive deleted].
57. Be more or less specific.
58. All generalizations are bad, which is why I never make blanket statements.
59. Comparisons are as bad as generalizations.
60. Corny analogies in formal writing are like feathers on a snake.
61. Who needs rhetorical questions?
62. Also, avoid any awfully awkward and aggravatingly affected alliteration.
63. People who resort to name-calling are rude, irreverent idiots.
64. Fantastic writers like you do not need to be told that flattery is unnecessary.
65. It is incumbent upon us to shun archaisms.
66. Do not use foreign phrases merely as a feux d'artifice to impress the gens du monde.
67. English is the de facto lingua franca.
68. Use only congruous oxymora.
69. Never contradict yourself always.
70. Write with sincerity, even if you do not mean what you are saying.
71. It is unlucky to hold any superstitions about your writing methods.
72. Use your own personal style, because you are unique, just like everyone else.
73. Eschew obfuscation.
74. Be sure to check the facts, as it is my belief that none of us is entitled to his own opinion.
75. Use caution when quoting statistics, because 43% of them are inaccurate.
76. Polls can also give a warped view of reality, according to a recent survey.
77. Be consistent with the font sizes in your text.
78. The same is desirable with font styles.
79. Be sure to keep an eye on the toner level in your printer.
80. Always finish what you
81. Last but not least, avoid clichés like the plague; seek viable alternatives.

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